{"id":5757,"date":"2017-03-03T19:54:12","date_gmt":"2017-03-03T19:54:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/?p=5757"},"modified":"2017-03-04T22:02:25","modified_gmt":"2017-03-04T22:02:25","slug":"can-shame-be-purposeful","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/2017\/03\/can-shame-be-purposeful\/","title":{"rendered":"Can “Shame” be Purposeful?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/SC-pastor-protests-marriage-equality-by-dressing-horse-in-a-wedding-dress-WJTV-TV-800x430.jpg?ssl=1\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-6305\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-6305\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/SC-pastor-protests-marriage-equality-by-dressing-horse-in-a-wedding-dress-WJTV-TV-800x430.jpg?resize=474%2C255&ssl=1\" alt=\"SC-pastor-protests-marriage-equality-by-dressing-horse-in-a-wedding-dress-WJTV-TV-800x430\" width=\"474\" height=\"255\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/SC-pastor-protests-marriage-equality-by-dressing-horse-in-a-wedding-dress-WJTV-TV-800x430.jpg?resize=800%2C430&ssl=1 800w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/SC-pastor-protests-marriage-equality-by-dressing-horse-in-a-wedding-dress-WJTV-TV-800x430.jpg?resize=300%2C161&ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/SC-pastor-protests-marriage-equality-by-dressing-horse-in-a-wedding-dress-WJTV-TV-800x430.jpg?resize=768%2C413&ssl=1 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 474px) 100vw, 474px\" \/><\/a>by Standerinfamilycourt<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>For though I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it; though I did regret it\u2014for I see that that letter caused you sorrow, though only for a while\u2014 <span id=\"en-NASB-28926\" class=\"text 2Cor-7-9\"><sup class=\"versenum hide\"><span style=\"font-size: small;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/sup>I now rejoice, not that you were made sorrowful, but that you were made sorrowful to the point of repentance; for you were made sorrowful according to the will of God, so that you might not suffer loss in anything<sup><span style=\"font-size: small;\">\u00a0 <\/span><\/sup>through us.<\/span>\u00a0 <span id=\"en-NASB-28927\" class=\"text 2Cor-7-10\">For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentance without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death.<\/span>\u00a0<\/strong>\u00a0 <\/em><strong>–\u00a0 2 Cor. 7:8-10<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Truth warriors\u00a0are finding out lately that no longer is the faithful pronouncement or application of God’s word merely “legalistic” or “judgmental”\u00a0in the estimation of the secular and even religious humanists.\u00a0\u00a0 Oh no, now we find out that truth-bearers\u00a0are <em>personally responsible<\/em> for the immoral\u00a0behavior choices (“acting out”) of others because we are “shaming” them!\u00a0\u00a0 Dare to produce the yardstick (moral absolute), and the instinctive\u00a0flight from measurement is deemed in our culture to be <em>directly due<\/em> to the fact that\u00a0this standard\u00a0has been brought to bear at all.<\/p>\n<p>However, this concept isn’t totally foreign to some compassionate, Christ-centered <em>evangelicals<\/em>, either, especially those who have spent some time as a prodigal or backslider.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The late Rev. Bob Steinkamp, for example, who founded <strong><em>Rejoice Marriage Ministries<\/em> <\/strong>with his wife Charlyne, regularly urged spouses who are standing for the restoration of their covenant marriages, and for the repentance of the spouse of their youth from an adulterous union, addiction or other destructive behavior, to carefully avoid being the cause of their <a href=\"https:\/\/www.rejoiceministries.org\/charlyne-cares-daily-devotional\/2016\/10\/11\/charlyne-cares-the-prodigals-guilt-and-shame-2\/\" target=\"_blank\">prodigal’s feelings of shame or guilt<\/a>.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The argument,\u00a0<em>with a certain amount\u00a0justification<\/em>,\u00a0is that these feelings hinder and delay a prodigal’s repentance.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Each and every day of hindered and resisted repentance is a day upon which that prodigal might further harden their own heart, and could eternally run out of time to repent.\u00a0 <em>Who wants to be an accomplice in such a\u00a0tragic ending for someone they love and are one-flesh with?<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Beyond that, people whom “standerinfamilycourt” truly admires frequently look down on “slut-shaming”, as when during last year’s U.S. presidential primary campaign, a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.dailymail.co.uk\/news\/article-3507259\/Things-just-got-ugly-Trump-retweets-unflattering-image-Heidi-Cruz-compared-Melania-Ted-hits-Donald-says-real-men-don-t-attack-women.html\" target=\"_blank\">lurid photo of our nation’s first centerfold First Lady<\/a> was produced by its<em> far-from-first<\/em> adulterous Chief Executive to demonstrate how much more “attractive” his wife is than his opponent’s covenant wife.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 People who responded in perfectly reasonable expressed disgust were then accused of that\u00a0allegedly-thoughtless\u00a0infraction of “slut-shaming”.<\/p>\n<p>At the other extreme, there is a Facebook page called <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/125531557832629\/photos\/a.125539307831854.1073741828.125531557832629\/125539311165187\/?type=3&theater\" target=\"_blank\">“Home Wreckers Exposed (She’s a Ho)” <\/a>where aggrieved wives can publicly expose by name and photo their spouse-poaching nemesis who has\u00a0used\u00a0the nation’s\u00a0immoral family courts and the culture’s growing acceptance of cohabitation to destroy\u00a0a covenant\u00a0home.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 On a related note, there was a post recently going around on a closed support page for covenant marriage standers that showed such a wife dragging her husband’s much-younger naked girlfriend through the street by the hair after catching her in the act.\u00a0 (One naturally wonders, similar to the story in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/passage\/?search=John+8%3A2-11&version=NASB\" target=\"_blank\">John, chapter 8<\/a> where the <em>male<\/em> adulterer was at that moment).<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/10\/FB-profile-7xtjw.png?ssl=1\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-502\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-502\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/10\/FB-profile-7xtjw.png?resize=27%2C32&ssl=1\" alt=\"FB profile 7xtjw\" width=\"27\" height=\"32\" \/><\/a>\u00a0<strong>SIFC Disclaimer<\/strong>:\u00a0 this kind of shaming is <em>never<\/em> purposeful!\u00a0 Jesus called it, “<em>not leaving room for God’s wrath<\/em>.”<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/ShesAHo.jpg?ssl=1\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-6312\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-6312\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/ShesAHo.jpg?resize=474%2C637&ssl=1\" alt=\"ShesAHo\" width=\"474\" height=\"637\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/ShesAHo.jpg?w=714&ssl=1 714w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/ShesAHo.jpg?resize=223%2C300&ssl=1 223w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 474px) 100vw, 474px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Somewhere in the middle of all this is the notion of vicarious or indirect shaming, such as SIFC’s beloved son-in-law recently rebuked\u00a0(since he has an aunt\u00a0who is in a longstanding lesbian relationship, and consequently he resents the idea of marriage adhering to an absolute\u00a0biblical standard).\u00a0\u00a0 It seems that many of the posts on our own Facebook page (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/nofaultequalsnoaccountability\/\" target=\"_blank\">Unilateral Divorce is Unconstitutional<\/a>) can be seen as the public “shaming” of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/?p=156\">practicing homosexuals<\/a>, as well as of\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/nofaultequalsnoaccountability\/posts\/1796827903889955?match=aG8gaG8gaG9tZXdyZWNrZXI%3D\" target=\"_blank\">legalized adulterers<\/a>.\u00a0\u00a0 His allegation is that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/nofaultequalsnoaccountability\/photos\/a.1511979265708155.1073741828.1506212662951482\/1700242113548535\/?type=3\" target=\"_blank\">such posts <\/a>turn people like his aunt off to “Christianity” altogether, because the real Jesus “didn’t throw stones”.\u00a0\u00a0 We would suggest in the alternative that the universal requirement to<a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/passage\/?search=Luke+14%3A26&version=NASB\" target=\"_blank\"> put Christ first and remove idols from our lives <\/a>is what <em>actually<\/em>\u00a0turns most people off to following Christ, regardless of their sexual orientation.<\/p>\n<p>It could reasonably be argued that any effort to resist full cooperation with a unilateral divorce petition could lead to the “public shaming” of one’s petitioning spouse, since in most cases doing so leads to a public trial that will expose the person’s deeds as a matter of<em> public record<\/em>.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hence, some situations which our immoral “family laws” put an innocent target of such a petition in will involve some <a href=\"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/?p=282\">very real and painful moral trade-offs<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>An excellent wife is the crown of her husband,<\/em><\/strong><br \/>\n<em><span class=\"text Prov-12-4\"><strong>But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones<\/strong>.<br \/>\n<\/span><\/em><span class=\"text Prov-12-4\">Proverbs 12:4<\/span><\/p>\n<p>So, is there a biblical imperative against causing or allowing\u00a0one’s wayward spouse\u00a0to experience shame which is so strong that it compels a true Christ-follower to sign <em>under oath<\/em> their concurrence with the typical slate of lies in such a “dissolution”\u00a0petition, some of which directly deny the power of God to redeem their holy matrimony union?\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 How does one balance the seemingly competing biblical imperatives <a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/passage\/?search=Matthew%205%3A39&version=NASB\" target=\"_blank\"><em>not to resist an evil person<\/em> <\/a>with the warning in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/passage\/?search=Revelation+21%3A8&version=NASB\" target=\"_blank\">Rev. 21:8<\/a> that <em>ALL liars will be thrown into the lake of fire<\/em>?<\/p>\n<p>Furthermore, if we follow the biblical\u00a0instructions from Jesus in Matthew 18\u00a0for bringing church discipline on someone who is sinning against their family,<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>\u201cIf your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother.\u00a0\u00a0 <span id=\"en-NASB-23744\" class=\"text Matt-18-16\"><span class=\"woj\">But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that <span class=\"small-caps\">by the mouth of two or three witnesses every<\/span> <span class=\"small-caps\">fact may be confirmed<\/span>.<\/span><\/span>\u00a0\u00a0 <\/em><span id=\"en-NASB-23745\" class=\"text Matt-18-17\"><span class=\"woj\"><em>If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector<\/em>.<\/span><\/span><sup><span style=\"font-size: small;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><\/sup><\/strong>(verses 15-17)<\/p>\n<p>…it also results in public shame <a href=\"https:\/\/www.scribd.com\/document\/266531116\/The-Village-Church-email-on-5-23-15-to-covenant-members-about-Karen-Hinkley-and-Jordan-Root\" target=\"_blank\"><u><span style=\"color: #0066cc;\">(and sometimes social media shame<\/span><\/u><\/a>), does it not?\u00a0\u00a0 Matt Chandler and his Village Church suffered backlash in 2015, finding this out the hard way when there was blowback from an attempt to discipline a church worker for having her 3-year marriage civilly annulled\u00a0because her husband\u00a0struggled with\u00a0same-sex attraction.<\/p>\n<p>Matt Walsh was recently “up to here” with the shame-blame game himself, in his own <a href=\"http:\/\/www.theblaze.com\/contributions\/matt-walsh-you-arent-being-shamed-just-because-we-expect-you-to-be-a-civilized-adult\/\" target=\"_blank\">recent blog<\/a>\u00a0(<em>but scout’s honor<\/em>, this blog was started way back in\u00a0August,\u00a0long before Matt’s was ).<\/p>\n<p>As only Mr. Walsh\u00a0can so eloquently put it:<\/p>\n<p>“<em>And for those who shame all of this shaming there\u2019s shame shaming, which often leads to shame shaming shaming and even shame shaming shaming shaming, which gives rise to the shaming of shame shamers who shame those who shame shamers for shame shaming shaming. We\u2019re all just ashamed all the time, it seems, but not so ashamed that we won\u2019t post heroic pictures of ourselves doing whatever it is we claim we\u2019re persecuted for doing. And, although society supposedly \u201cshames\u201d this activity, we\u2019re sure to get 100 thousand likes and 50 thousand shares and 10 thousand laudatory comments. “<\/em><\/p>\n<p>He continues:<\/p>\n<p><em>“Contrary to what these shame fighters say, many of our societal problems are born from a\u00a0cataclysmic\u00a0<em>lack<\/em> of shame. We have become something like the spoiled brat who throws\u00a0a tantrum because her parents got her the wrong color Ferrari for her sweet sixteen. It\u2019s not as though this indignity is the last straw in a long series of incidents where the poor, neglected child wasn\u2019t given exactly what she wanted. Rather, this is the <em>first<\/em> time in her life that she didn\u2019t get exactly what she wanted.” <\/em><\/p>\n<p>Is there an outright\u00a0biblical prohibition on “shaming” another?\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Is there proverbial wisdom against it?\u00a0\u00a0 Is there a proverbial description of negative consequences from publicly drawing attention to the immorality of another, or from engaging in indirect communications that allude to that immorality?\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 What definition of “shaming” actually triggers negative consequences for the “shamer” according to biblical wisdom?<\/p>\n<p>SIFC has found that an effective biblical word study on <em>shame<\/em> and<em> shaming<\/em> requires quite an investment of time.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 According to www.biblegateway.com, there are <a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/quicksearch\/?search=shame&version=NASB;NIV;GNV;KJV;YLT&searchtype=all&resultspp=250\" target=\"_blank\">262 Hebrew or Greek references to shame or shaming <\/a>between the Old and New Testaments, and literally dozens of different Hebrew and Greek words from which the word “shame” was translated, with differing shades of meaning, especially in Hebrew.<\/p>\n<p>A sampling, which is far from exhaustive:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/954.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/954.htm<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <em>bosh<br \/>\nA primitive root; properly, to pale, i.e. By implication to be ashamed; also (by implication) to be disappointed or delayed — (be, make, bring to, cause, put to, with, a-)shamed(-d), be (put to) confounded(-fusion), become dry, delay, be long.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_937.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_937.htm<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <em>buz\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 (laughingstock)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_8103.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_8103.htm<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <em>shimtsah\u00a0 (derision)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_6172.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_6172.htm<\/a><em>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><em>ervah\u00a0\u00a0 (nakedness, indecency)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_4045.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_4045.htm<\/a>\u00a0 <em>migereth (rebuke)<br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_3971.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_3971.htm<\/a>\u00a0 <em>mum (blemished)<br \/>\n<\/em><br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/2781.htm<em><\/em>\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/2781.htm<em>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/em><\/a><em>cherpah\u00a0 (reproach)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_3639.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/strongs_3639.htm<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0 <em>kelimmah (dishonor; reproach)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/955.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/955.htm<em>\u00a0 <\/em><\/a><em>bushah\u00a0(related to <strong>bosh<\/strong>)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/7036.htm\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/hebrew\/7036.htm<\/a><em>\u00a0 qalon (ignominy, dishonor)<\/em><\/p>\n<p>…As in, Proverbs 9:7, <em>“<strong>He who corrects a scoffer gets dishonor for himself,\u00a0 <span class=\"text Prov-9-7\">And he who reproves a wicked man gets insults for himself.”<\/span><\/strong><\/em><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/818.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/818.htm<\/a>\u00a0 <em>atimaz\u00f3 (dishonor)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/819.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/819.htm<\/a>\u00a0<em> atimia (dishonor)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/2617.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/2617.htm<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <em>kataischuno\u00a0 (confound, put down)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/150.htm\" target=\"_blank\"><u><span style=\"color: #0066cc;\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/150.htm<\/span><\/u><\/a><em>\u00a0\u00a0 <em>aischros (base \/ disgraceful)<\/em><\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/5195.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/5195.htm<em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><\/em><\/a><em><em>hubriz\u00f3<\/em><\/em><em> (\u00a0using unfair tactics to inflict undeserved <i>harm<\/i>)<br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/1788.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/1788.htm<\/a>\u00a0 <em><strong>entrep\u00f3<\/strong>\u00a0 (put into a state of turning or recoiling)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/1791.htm\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/1791.htm<\/a>\u00a0 <strong><em>entrop\u00e9\u00a0 <\/em><\/strong><em>(confusion \/ shame)<\/em><\/p>\n<div class=\"vheading2\">HELPS Word-studies<\/div>\n<p class=\"discovery\"><b>1788<\/b> <i>entr\u00e9p\u014d<\/i> (from <a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/greek\/1722.htm\"><u><span style=\"color: #0066cc;\">1722<\/span><\/u><\/a> <i>\/en<\/i>, “in” and <i>tr\u00e9p\u014d<\/i>, “to turn”) \u2013 properly <i>in<\/i> (a state of) <i>turning<\/i>, i.e. to turn one’s attention to in a riveted (“locked-in”) way. This term is also used of recoiling (turning away) in shame, at times of a “wholesome shame which leads a man to consideration of his condition” (Berry).<\/p>\n<p>When we get to the Greek, we can start to see that shame can also have a\u00a0positive purpose\u00a0(<strong><em>entrep\u00f3<\/em><\/strong>), and indeed, Paul reminds us in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/passage\/?search=Romans+12%3A20&version=NASB\" target=\"_blank\">Romans 12:20 <\/a>that it is entirely possible (and desirable) to cause someone to feel shame even as a by-product of actual kind acts, especially when done in response to malicious acts done to us by the same individuals…<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<strong><em><span class=\"small-caps\">But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals on his head<\/span>.\u201d<\/em> <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>“Standerinfamilycourt” likens the culturally-popular rhetoric around “shaming” to the popular claims that\u00a0Christians are not to “judge”.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Logically, a <em>judgment<\/em> must be made before one makes a determination to “shame”, so the connection is obvious.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Carefully examined, however, the scripture says that Christians are not to judge in an unrighteous manner while being guilty of the same or similar infraction of God’s law.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0That is, they must be able to withstand being measured by the same yardstick they would apply to another (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/passage\/?search=Luke+6%3A37-38&version=NASB\" target=\"_blank\">Luke 6:37-38<\/a>).<\/p>\n<p>Furthermore, it is impossible to accuse someone of judging unless the accuser is also judging the accusee.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <em>But<\/em>, if one instead complains about the <em>end product<\/em> of applying that judgment (or any similar form of rebuke or criticism), i.e. “shaming”, this self-righteous difficulty is effectively bypassed\u00a0in the\u00a0(non-discerning) eyes of\u00a0most people.\u00a0\u00a0 After all, those who object to Melania having been <em>accurately<\/em> described as an adulterous trollop can’t very well say to anybody else, “<em>you have <strong>no right<\/strong> to make a moral judgment\u00a0against someone posing nude and her ‘husband’ publicly boasting about it”.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>A clear distinction certainly must be made between “shame” that is an\u00a0unavoidable by-product of some action that carried a larger, selfless purpose, and actual shaming that is carried out vindictively or manipulatively as an end in itself.\u00a0 Guilt remains unproductive if the Holy Spirit does not transform that feeling into <em>conviction<\/em>, and<em> shame <\/em>remains unproductive unless that emotion matures into <em>godly sorrow<\/em>.\u00a0\u00a0 This is more likely to occur with incidental, rather than targeted rebuke.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God\u2019s wrath, for it is written: \u201cIt is mine to avenge; I will repay,\u201d says the Lord.<\/em><\/strong><br \/>\nRomans 12:19<\/p>\n<p><strong>www.standerinfamilycourt.com<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>7 Times Around the Jericho Wall\u00a0 |\u00a0 Let’s Repeal Unilateral Divorce!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Standerinfamilycourt For though I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it; though I did regret it\u2014for I see that that letter caused you sorrow, though only for a while\u2014 \u00a0I now rejoice, not that you were made sorrowful, but that you were made sorrowful to the point of repentance; for … <a href=\"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/2017\/03\/can-shame-be-purposeful\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Can “Shame” be Purposeful?<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">→<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[28,26,36,13,25],"tags":[34,27],"class_list":["post-5757","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-church-discipline","category-discipleship-religious-freedom-2","category-lost-culture","category-morality","category-spiritual-warfare","tag-morality","tag-restoration"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p57mep-1uR","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5757","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5757"}],"version-history":[{"count":107,"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5757\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6374,"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5757\/revisions\/6374"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5757"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5757"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.standerinfamilycourt.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5757"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}